Adopting a Kitten: Are we an unfit pet family?
Posted: Sunday, May 18, 2008
by Jon Searles
Recently, our cat, PK passed away from feline lymphoma. PK (short for Pretty Kitty) was a member of our family for 11 years. She was a temperamental animal who only seemed to love my wife and daughter and tolerated my sons and me.
We have always had animals as part of our lives. We currently have three large dogs that were all rescued from animal shelters or found sick on the side of the road. They have been part of our lives for 11, 8, and 4 years. The dogs spend most of their time in a large fenced yard or sleeping at night in their kennels. We walk them and interact with them daily. Prior to these three hairy beasts I had my dog from college days for over 15 years and another for 13 years. We also had a cat in the early part of our marriage for 15 years. My wife was raised on a farm and had animals all her life. We have instilled in our children the love and respect of life through the raising of our pets. The pets become part of the family and we become emotionally attached. My middle son has even raised 3 turtles, Spike and Speedy, for over 9 years!
If this sounds like a resume in an attempt to justify our right to own pets and qualify for pet ownership, then maybe it is. We recently decided to replace our beloved PK with a new kitten. My daughter went on line to find a furry face that might be available in the local area adoption pages. We found a private pet adoption group who has kittens available and we inquired about one of the females available. Then it began.
The Rescuer, that is what we will call the woman working with the adoption group, began to ask questions, via email, about our pet experience and our intentions with the kitten. At first, this seemed very logical and a nice way to ensure the safety of the animals in the adoption process. Let me digress slightly and tell you we are not talking about a pure bred Persian, Siamese, or Himalayan lineage, but a standard stray cat that had kittens that needed homes. Now, we have noticed since moving here from the south that cats and dogs in the Northeast of New England are more expensive, shelters seldom euthanize, and strays seem to be under control in most city areas. We attributed this to good animal control and responsible pet ownership. Where we come from there are problems with feral cats, stray dogs, and animal cruelty through neglect.
The Rescuer began to ask questions which involved the cats living arrangements. Our cats have always been indoor cats that on occasion venture outside on sunny days to chase bugs and rodents. They were never left out overnight, normally because of coyotes in the area that consider them a delicacy. When The Rescuer found out the cat may be allowed to venture beyond the front door she responded "You said you let your cats outside? I am 100% against that. There are so many dangers outside and people think the cats need to go outside. They get fleas, ear mites, worms the list goes on." Needless to say I never mentioned the coyotes.
The Rescuer then decided to probe how we raise our dogs and when we mentioned they spent most of their time outside (which I thought would calm her fears of the dogs and new kitten interacting in the house) and at night they are put in their kennels to sleep. She responded in the email "The other thing you mentioned was you have " outdoor" dogs? What is that? Your dogs live outside? And dogs being locked outside all day then locked in a cage all night again I think we probably disagree on that =) Why are they locked in a kennel? Why can't they sleep on your bed or floor?" Now, I do not begrudge anyone the decision to have an indoor dog that wanders around the house and sleeps on the floor in the home. The first dog I mentioned that I had for 15 years was such a dog. Smart, obedient, loving, and a personality of breed that would make her almost human. I could be accused of anthropomorphic tendencies when it comes to some animals and pets. Unfortunately, The Rescuer and I were now beginning a debate on animal care that seemed one sided and a debate that was going on without her knowing all the history and information on the animals involved. Briefly, these dogs were all strays, two weight over 80 lbs and the small is 40 lbs. They love the sunshine and playing in the wading pool in their enclosure. The enclosure also has two outbuildings for inclement weather. They whine if they cannot go outside and they whine if they cannot come in at night and go to sleep in their kennels. My wife and children are the primary care givers and do a great job giving love and attention to the dogs. They are allowed inside on occasion when they have been cleaned and sanitized, but they do prefer the outdoors.
In an effort to avoid confrontation with The Rescuer and step away from a conversation that would only end in each of us disagreeing with the understanding of pet ownership, we decided to walk away from this adoption group and find an organization that needed a loving home for a kitten. My wife and I would better understand this type of interaction if we were attempting to adopt a child, but I was concerned that The Rescuer was soon going to ask to do a home inspection and visit for this cat, and while I have no doubt the kitten would find a safe and happy home, I am not so sure The Rescuer would be treated with the same respect. My wife did feel a little hurt that she would not qualify to adopt a stray cat from this adoption group. I assured her we could get one on the stray cat black market if necessary. Sometimes my humor is lost.
The Rescuer is definitely entitled to her opinion and as the care giver for the cats in her charge; she is undoubtedly doing a thorough and conscientious job. Who cares if a few people are slightly insulted in the process? My hope is that this woman is involved in social work of some kind that would allow her to use her talents in child foster care or child adoption. The more I write this article the more I realize that although we may be a little right of center of our pet ownership and she a little left of center, we both want what is best for the animal. Maybe The Rescuer is actually an 8 year old little girl trying to find the best home for her furry friends.
However, with what is happening now in the aftermath of earthquakes, cyclones, and world food shortages I guess I would like to thank you for your patience during your time reading this article.
Jon, I am blown away, I am from Australia and had no idea pet adoption groups existed. We have 4 cats, all whom have adopted us, Felix found us at a young age and we had her fixed up so she couldn't have more kittens then 3 more little kittens lost their mother and again found us, $400.00 later more little ops to make sure no strays would come from our house. Now in the past couple of days I have seen two new little faces appearing in out front yard, where to draw the line!! My only wish is that families take on the responsiblity of making sure their pets cannot keep on producing. I hope you find your kitten!Please log in to respond to this comment.
Jon, I too hope you find yourselves a nice little kitten. The Rescuer should realize that no two people are going to care for a pet in the same way. The Rescuer should also realize that their way is not necessarily the "right" way. This is one of the things I find infuriating about some people. As long as the pet is happy, properly fed and as well protected from danger as is humanly possible (after all, "danger" for humans is only a bar-of-soap-in-the-shower away...safety is a comforting illusion), what more is necessary? It is good that the Rescuer is so concerned for the future welfare of the pets in her fostering, but maybe, if they are too concerned, they should just keep them all themselves! DiannePlease log in to respond to this comment.
hi jon, it seems to have gone from one extreme to the other, as a lot of things do. before, no shelter cared who you were or where you lived, now, you need to be certified in some way. it sounds like your family is one of great pet lovers and caregivers. thanks for sharing, sue thomPlease log in to respond to this comment.
Hi Jon. Thanks for this article, it gave me a good laugh! I just wanted to say that this woman was definitely an extremist, and I hope everyone will consider that there are many people of varying degrees amongst the animal rescue/animal advocate group community. Some are much more realistic than this woman and from what I read about the way you care for your animals, I think you should have been immediately approved for adoption and thanked for giving a needy kitten a good home! If it were me, I would have tried to convince you that a pair would be better. By the way, I have a cat named PK too - found her near the Chippery in Austin. I'm sorry for your loss but your PK had a good life and I'm sure you have found a great new kitty by now. Hope to see more writing from you soon! LillianPlease log in to respond to this comment.
Here in the UK when cats and dogs are "adopted", it is usual for questions to be asked about their proposed care. For pedigree animals it is quite usual for the breeder to visit the home.It is considered both natural and desirable for cats to go outside, unless they are Rag Dolls or Sphynx cats, for which being outside the home would be a positive danger. It is illegal to "declaw" cats here, as some people do in the US, as that is considered dangerous for the cat. If you wish to own a cat, you must accept that they will claw the furniture!I think that the woman who interviewed you is suffering from a very severe case of anthropomorphism!Please log in to respond to this comment.